Monday, June 12, 2006

...sleepy...

So I'm pretty sleepy this morning...

Reason Why I'm Pretty Sleepy This Morning 1:

That Bastard On His Bike:

So it's starting to warm up here in Japan land. Its over 20 degrees at night so we sleep with the doors open. Not so bad. Quiet street and all that. Until about 3 o'clock this morning when one of the circular delivery chaps delivers (as he does) his circulars by moonlight....

...on a motorbike...
...with a muffler problem....
...and squeaky brakes....
...and a squeaky kickstand...
...with a cold...

So we hear as he turns the corner into our street....
...squeaks to a halt outside the first house...
...kicks down his squeaky kick stand...
...coughs...
...hoicks...
(presumably delivers a circular)
...gets on his bike...
...kicks up the squeaky kick stand...
...revs the engine...
...kicks it into gear and tears 5 metres up the road to the next house, whereby he...

...squeaks to a halt outside the second house...
...kicks down his squeaky kick stand...
...coughs...
...hoicks...
(presumably delivers a circular)
...gets on his bike...
...kicks up the squeaky kick stand...
...revs the engine...
...kicks it into gear and tears 5 metres up the road to the next house whereby he...

...you get the idea...

It continued like this all the way up our street until he got to our house whereby he decided to really outdo himself.

...etc...
...etc...
...etc...
...coughs...
...hoicks...
...sniffs...
...coughs...
...hoicks...
...runs up stairs...
...trips...
...falls...
...swears...
(definately delivers circular)
...HOPS DOWN STAIRS ONE AT A TIME HAVING PRESUMABLY INJURED HIMSELF BY TRIPPING UP THEM SECONDS BEFORE...
...swears at every step...
...etc...
...etc...
...etc...

Reason Why I'm Pretty Sleepy This Morning 2:

Enormous Bloody Earthquake At 5:01 This Morning:

This was probably one of the biggest earthquakes I have ever been in. It started as a low rumbling that went on for a while then suddenly kicked into quite the rolling, shaking mess. It was cool fun. Turns out it was centered a couple of hundred kms away and 140 kms deep, but it was most severe right here in sunny Hiroshima. Just on 5 on the Japanese scale. Rolly and jumpy, but no real damage.
The news reports are the best following a quake like this. Crack teams of reporters are sent out immediately to find as much gore and horror as they can. Luckily in this instance there was none. Which leaves the reporters in quite a quandry. they KNOW people will be tuning in to get the reports of the earthquake and see if there is a tidal wave alert, but the also KNOW that not really all that much happened. Which leads to excellent interviews like the ones this morning:

Excited TV News Reporter Talking Exclusively To EyeWitness:
"So! The Earthquake! Lucky to be alive-aaah! Tell us all about it-aaaah!!

Exclusive EyeWitness:
"The ground shook for a bit and then it stopped"

Excited TV News Reporter Talking Exclusively to EyeWitness:
"You must have been terrified! So close to death-aah!!"

Exclusive EyeWitness:
"Eh? Not really. The ground did shake a bit. But then it stopped"

Or the guy that ran to the train station to hear about any carnage on the rails...

Excited TV Reporter Talking to Rail Spokesperson:
"So-aaah. Any horrible train wrecks!"

Rail Spokesperson:
"No. The ground shook for a bit and then it stopped. All our emergency systems worked and we were back on schedule within minutes"

Excited TV Reporter Talking to Rail Spokesperson:
"Commuter Chaos! Underfunding? Employee dissatisfaction? Outmoded training and management styles?"

Rail Spokesperson:
"No. The ground shook for a bit and then it stopped. We were back on schedule within minutes"

Excited TV Reporter:
"Obviously still shaken from his near death ordeal...Back to you in the studio"

Teeheehee. So thats the talk of the town at present. We're OK. Things are good. Hope all is well.
Yours.
Sleepy Berin.


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