We stayed at the W Hotel Seoul, which was nifty, swell and terrific rolled into one handy BONKERS little package. This is the jacuzzi in our room overlooking the river. Nic refused to point blank to call me Mr Bond. Which hurt a little.
This is me plotting my Complete World Domination (CWD), as well as promising myself to be on the lookout for Those Damned Pesky Kids (TDPK) and reminding myself NOT to reveal all of my Dastardly Plans (DP) to them by way of gloating while they are in some sort of Completely Implausible And Easy To Escape From Death Contraption(CIAETEFDC). All in the hotel bar. Veeery convenient.
This was the pool. Also bonkers.
Oh. And I met Spidey. He is buff with a capital "B". So he was happy to meet a like-spirit in myself. He also always has time for a "Look Both Ways When Crossing The Street Kids" Thumbs Up. What a guy...
'nuff said
...cotton. Acres and acres of cotton. We went to an entire department store of fabric. This was the basement. IT WAS ALL COTTON. In the classic wall-to-ceiling-city-block-sized-fire-trap layout. The next floor was buttons....ALL BUTTONS...and so on. Nic went a little feral and threatened to "cut me" when I suggested that 4 hours on the 4th floor (BEADS...ALL BEADS) was enough. The security guards helped me get the QuikUnpick out of her deathlike grip.
We went to the DMZ. About an hour and a half from Seoul City. Thats North Korea straight ahead and the blue buildings are half in the North and half in the South, the concrete line you can see between the two is the border. It was a strange place to be.
These guys were bitchin'.
Technically I'm standing in North Korea here.
Through that doorway behind me I could hear all the fun of the Kim Jong Il Appreciation Society. All I had for protection was this cat. Check out the Shiny Helmet that I can only guess says "STEP TO ME. I WILL KICK YOUR COMMIE ASS" in Korean on the front.
These guys were everywhere - they all stood like this - rock solid to attention the whole time we were there. The kicker for me was that they all kept their fists clenched THE WHOLE TIME as if barely holding back their pinko-commie-kicking-tae-kwon-do-skillz. Then there was the Ray-Bans, the GOLD raybans. I gave this guy a hug and told him he could be my wingman ANYTIME...
Here's another look. This guys right foot is in South Korea and his left foot is in the North. Seriously, the Ray Bans? Brilliant.
The tallest flagpole in the world.
160 Meters tall and the flag weighs 270 odd kilos. They have to whip it down as soon as rain threatens 'cos it'll bring the whole thing down if the flag gets too wet.(...)
Charm, adds a bit of charm.
Thats North Korea over there - looks a little.....bleak. Note how the trees are all gone from their side of the fence. I was informed very gravely by a Japanese chap on my return that the North Koreans cut all the trees down because they "...hate nature...". He refused to accept that it might be because they are "...bloody freezing..."
Still.
Bloody big flag that...
...thats a lot of cassette tapes. I felt pretty old looking at these. I haven't seen this many tapes since I don't know when...and so neatly stacked!!
This is Nic at the biggest BBQ Restaurant in the world - seats 1600 people. That's a lot of beefy goodness to be cooked over charcoal at your table.
Still.
We managed.
Mmmmm. Beefy goodness....
Continuing the food theme, this is Nic with the Pancake From Beyond. It's got sugar and cinnamon folded into a little joey pouch inside it, then it's deep fried to all buggery. Mmmmmm. Deep Fried Goodness...
But this, ladies and gentlemen, this one took the cake....
THIS is the food of the future.
THIS will take us to Mars and back.
Soylent Green isn't people you drooling-right-wing-gun-nut-freak! Soylent Green is A-HOT-DOG-ON-STICK-WITH-THE-CHIPS-ALREADY-ATTACHED!!!!!!!
(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
I don't know if you can tell from the photo, but I am actually crying a tear of joy over the triumph of the human spirit here.
Would you look at this!!!
The chips!!
They're ALREADY attached!!!
They are FRIED into place!!!!!
Unbeleivable.
Richard - you were mentioned in dispatches.
Truly a life changing discovery.
I can't go on...
Close-Up...
THE CHIPS ARE FRIED IN PLACE FOR PETES SAKE!!!!
There's a lot of Kimchi in Korea.
And it's bloody good. This was at one of the main markets in Seoul. Where we saw a guy skinning a pig in a alleyway. Thats what I'm after in a market. Pig skinning. And hots dogs with chips fried into them (did I mention those?)
Again at the market. Ready to eat Pigs Trotters that look like something out of "A Very Dahmer Christmas"
Mmmm. Pork.
Me and the tank that stopped that Nazi Bastard. The mighty, mighty T-34.
For some reason there was a whole bunch of Soviet hardware lying about the place...nice tank, as far as they go...
These guys were a hell of a funny. We saw them at the War Memorial Museum - they were Korean Army Recruits on a field trip - presumably to take the piss out of their forebears - check out their poses vs. those of the statue behind them...
So yeah. Seoul was good fun. Get along in there.
Not much happening at present. Watching the appreciation of the Yen vs. the depreciation of the kiwi dollar with much glee and hand rubbing.
Hope all is well hither and yon.
Tooroo.
B.
